New Study Finds Direct Correlation Between Owning Air Fryer and Telling Everyone You Own an Air Fryer

1 Min Read

Seattle, Washington – Researchers at the University of Washington unveiled a new study last week linking air fryer ownership to compulsive boasting, sparking chuckles across social media and kitchen appliance circles.

The study, led by Dr. Elena Fryman, a 42-year-old behavioral psychologist who admits to hiding her own air fryer in the garage, surveyed 500 households and found that 87% of owners mentioned their device unprompted within the first five minutes of any conversation. “It’s like they’ve discovered fire all over again,” Fryman quipped during a press conference, holding up a chart showing spikes in air fryer mentions at dinner parties and PTA meetings. One participant, 35-year-old barista Tim Hargrove, confessed, “I got mine six months ago, and now every time someone asks about my weekend, I launch into how my air-fried zucchini fries beat any restaurant’s—it’s involuntary, like sneezing.”

Critics, however, question the methodology, with appliance retailer Sarah Kline, 28, rolling her eyes at the findings. “Sure, I tell my friends about my Ninja AF101, but only because it crisps up chicken wings without the guilt—it’s not bragging, it’s evangelism,” she insisted, waving a bag of frozen fries as evidence. The study also noted a 23% uptick in air fryer-related Instagram posts since the pandemic, correlating with owners’ increased home cooking time.

Looking ahead, Fryman plans a follow-up study on whether air fryer evangelists can be rehabilitated through group therapy or mandatory mute buttons on kitchen gadgets, potentially revolutionizing small talk at family gatherings.

⚠️ SATIRE DISCLAIMER: This website is a work of satire and humor. Articles, stories, and content are fictional and intended for entertainment purposes only.

Discover more from The Questionable Times

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading